Saturday, May 9, 2009

Landslide

I haven't updated for a while, so this may be quite lengthy. I was up at 6:30 am. Quite early for a Saturday. My guys are out turkey hunting. For my son's sake I hope they get one, Danny will be thrilled. However, I have no idea what to do with it and really don't want to cook a turkey dinner in the near future. I should know what to do with it being that my dad was one of the best hunters I have ever known. If it weren't for my dad hunting and bagging game, there were times growing up that we probably wouldn't have had meat on the table. Being that my dad worked construction and every year he would get laid off in October and not go back to work until spring.
Yesterday was Friday. I'm off on Friday's. I didn't feel like doing anything at all. I had grocery shopping to do, which depresses me. I'm amazed at how the cost of groceries goes up each week! Anyway, I remembered my BFF Lisa was off, so I called her and asked if she wanted to do lunch. We met around 10:00, walked through Big Lots for a while, then went to Eat-n-Park. Lisa and I hadn't seen each other since I don't know when, basically LIFE HAPPENS. I can not remember when I've had so much on my schedule. Lisa and I enjoyed a leisurely lunch. It was so nice, if nice is even the word I should use to describe it. Our kids weren't there to keep interrupting, our husbands weren't there with their attitudes, it was just us. Lis and Sher. I wasn't a mom, I wasn't a wife, I was me. I haven't felt like me in such a long time. Something my husband just does not understand. Remember, he can not think outside of the box. I felt re-energized afterwards. Of course after I got home and Dan found out I ate lunch out, he gave me major attitude and didn't talk to me for the rest of the night. Seems as though he doesn't like it when I'm happy, he feels the need to burst my bubble every time.
Lisa's son went to his prom yesterday. Oh my! Lee looked so handsome. What a kid! Where has the time gone? Graduating high school and off to college in August. I'm totally dumbfounded by it. Lisa emailed me prom pics last night and I cried. I'm tearing up just thinking about it now. I've known Lee since he was in the womb. I used to change his diapers, he puked in my hair when he was a baby! My niece Lauren turns 18 this week. My sister and I are having an 18th birthday party for her next Saturday. Lauren only invited 85 of her closest friends! Lauren's prom was a couple of weeks ago. I went to her friends house to take pictures. After a while I had to leave. I was going to start bawling! I was looking at this beautiful young woman standing in front of me wondering where the time has gone. Lauren has gone from this bald, big blue eyed baby to this gorgeous young woman with long blond curly hair. My baby will be 8 in a month! 8! Danny is losing his baby-ness and gaining his independence. It is so hard to let go. Danny doesn't feel the need to hold my hand when in parking lots, he gives me the quickest kiss at the bus stop for fear of someone seeing. Just not to long ago, he would hug and hug me and wouldn't want to let go of me before getting on the bus. I guess Stevie Nicks sums it up the best, "Children get older and I'm getting older too." - Landslide
I should have listen to the advice of elders growing up. Slow down, take you time, time goes so fast. Enjoy your kids to the max, they don't stay babies forever, don't wish away time. Geez had I known then what I know now...
Anyway...my Cricut broke last night. I'm a little upset over it. I shouldn't say that it is broken, it will still cut, but the hinge/gear thing broke that lifts up the cover. My husband could care less. Should I expect anything different? My son tried to console me all evening. I have to open the cover myself, the part with the display screen. Well, maybe I can talk to my mom and she'll get me the Expression for Christmas. Yes, my mom spoils me! Speaking of mom's tomorrow is Mother's Day. I can predict my Mother's Day, I will cook our breakfast only because my husband will use my being on Weight Watchers as a cop out. I make breakfast every Sunday so you would think by now he would know what to cook, I've been doing it for 11 weeks. I have turkey bacon and turkey sausage in the fridge just waiting... I would like to spend time with my mom, after all, it is Mother's Day! Dan doesn't understand that. My mom will not be here forever, so while she is here, I want to spend all of the time that I can with her. I want Danny to have memories of the times he and his Nana shared. To me it is not a big deal to be catered to. I would much rather give to others than have others give to me. Just cook me breakfast and I'll be happy. Danny gave me my Mother's Day gift yesterday when he got home from school. He planted a pansy in a little Terra cotta pot that he decorated with tissue paper and modge podge. He was so proud! I love it! I told Danny that I will plant my pansy in the flower garden. Danny was so excited that I loved it.
I'm hoping to finish Lauren's birthday present that I'm making today. I bought a chipboard purse at Michael's, and on each page will be a letter from her name, a word using that letter that describes her and some little memory of her that I have. I started it last night. I also have to go out and find something for my mom for Mother's Day. There are 2 greenhouses I'm going to go to. I would like to get her a hanging basket or something of the sort, or maybe a gift card and she can use it to pick out her flowers for her garden.
I apologize for writing a novel here. But this is very therapeutic for me. I can type my thoughts at random instead of keeping them inside. I'm off to get a shower now. I'll post again later on or tomorrow at some point.

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